


Crash Into You

by sullacat



Series: Taking Chances [2]
Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-20
Updated: 2011-06-20
Packaged: 2017-10-20 14:17:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/213666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sullacat/pseuds/sullacat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The worst day of Jim Kirk's life is almost over.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crash Into You

**Author's Note:**

> for my Schmoop Bingo card - Bad day. These characters are not mine, no infringement intended.

2258.42 changed the history of the Federation forever. Billions died in a matter of hours. The planet Vulcan no longer existed. Starfleet had been decimated, the flower of a generation destroyed like broken toys by a mad man.

There wasn't a person on Earth that wasn't somehow affected by what happened, but one man was there to see it all, the weight of it all heavy on his shoulders. Right or wrong, Jim went over the entire day in his head over and over again, from his dressing down by the Academy board that morning over the fucking Kobayashi Maru, to the time it took him to get Pike to finally believe him, to the endless fighting with Spock, and the battle with Nero. Each time he tried something different in his head, some subtle change that made things better, that _saved lives_.

But he couldn't turn back time, no matter how hard he tried, and now he sat here in Engineering, as he made rounds of the ship to ensure everyone had every bit of help they needed. Jim rubbed his aching throat and nodded at Scotty, who assured him that everything that could be done would be done, but would the nice captain please '...get out of our hair so we can get moving?'. Jim glared back at his engineer, but left, knowing this part of the ship was in good hands. Time to check on the others.

Quartermaster's office was alive, bustling with getting rooms and supplies for crew that hadn't expected to be on board for this long. The galley was full of food, that much was good, and the replicators seemed to be online for those extra things they needed. Spock had managed to fix up a skeleton crew to man the essential areas for the next six hours. Chekov and Scotty estimated they'd be make it back to Earth on impulse power in five days, two if they pushed it and got the warp drives online, and as much as Jim didn't relish the idea of getting back there and explaining everything, they needed to get Pike closer to a medical station soon.

Not that Jim doubted Bones' abilities. He'd swung by Sickbay twice as he was getting everyone on board situated only to find Bones still in surgery, hours later, still working on Pike. "Have him contact me when he gets out," Jim muttered softly to Nurse Chapel, who nodded tiredly at the captain.

Jim was talking to Spock and his father in a lounge set up for the Vulcans when he got the message from Sickbay - _Done._ Jim stared at it for a long moment before looking up at the Vulcan. "Pike, he's out of surgery. I'm gonna go check on him." Spock gave a worried sort of look, at least what appeared to Jim to be a worried look (all these looks blended together in his head) and returned to the conversation with the Vulcan elders.

He found Bones sitting down typing into one of the terminals. "How is he?"

"I don't know," Bones replied, not looking up until he was done with the sentence he was typing. When he did look up, it was weary, guarded eyes that took in Jim. "Say something."

Jim's face wrinkled up, questioning. "Like what? What am I supposed to say?"

Bones sighed. "That was enough." He got up and pulled out his tricorder, and pointed at the chair he'd been sitting in. "Any reason you didn't come in and get checked out today?"

Jim glared at him, but sat down. "I was busy," he croaked out, his voice breaking, betraying him.

"Your fuckin' larynx is bruised to hell. Any one of the medical staff here could have done this," Bones said, holding a regen unit against Jim's throat, the hum familiar and warm as it began working. Jim opened his mouth to speak when he was cut off again. "Wasn't like I could go chase you down like I always do. Was sort of busy, trying to slice this goddamn slug off of the Captain's brain stem."

Jim kept silent until Bones removed the regenerator. "You think I was just goofing off, huh? Yeah, you know me, fucking around, never do -OUCH- never do nothing right..."

They kept staring at each other, not talking after a while, and Jim tried to remember why he came down here anyway. To see Pike, yeah, he had to check on how the captain was, but... he wanted to see Bones, too. Needed to see that his best friend was okay. Bones, who always did this, yelled and glared and then got angry and quiet whenever Jim came crawling in from a bar fight or hurt himself while sparring with a friend. Everything back to normal, Jim thought, a little sad as Bones lifted his shirt and began scanning his ribs, and for a moment he wondered where that guy from last night was, the one that kissed him under the stars.

Who was real, that guy or this scowling doctor in front of him? "Am I done here?"

"You're done when I say you're done," Bones retorted, then walked off in the direction of one of the nurses. Jim was on the verge of pulling the regen unit off and throwing it at Bones when he noticed the doctor limping a little, and frowned. _Just like the hypocrite to not take his own advice_ , Jim told himself and waited for the regen unit on his side to stop. "Now am I done?"

"Yeah," Bones said. "All fixed up, until the next time."

"Alright," Jim said, biting back a retort. "Now, you come with me."

"I'm busy here, Jim, I can't-"

"Now." Jim looked at him with the same look he'd given Spock on the bridge earlier, the one that said he was through taking shit from people.

Bones looked back, then turned to one of the other doctors that Jim didn't know. "I'll be back in a minute," he said, following Jim out of Sickbay and down the hall, turning the corner until they reached crew quarters.

Jim punched in an override code and opened the door. "Get in there."

Bones shook his head, taking a step back. "I need to be closer if there's an emergency. There's a cot in the office for-"

"No," Jim replied, putting his hand on Bones' arm so he couldn't move anymore. "I'm the fucking captain, at least until we get this ship back home. Now get in there before I order you in there.

Bones stared at him through glazed eyes, as if wondering if it were worth it to push it, just to see how serious Jim was. In the end, he pushed past Jim, muttering, "Two hours." Sitting at a table, he pulled off his boots. "And only if you sleep, too. You need to rest, more than the rest of us."

"Four," Jim answered, following him inside.

"And you?" Bones repeated, heading for the bed in the corner of the room.

"Yeah, me too," Jim said, not planning on laying there for four hours, but it was easier to agree to what Bones said now, and then just leave later.

They flopped on the bed and both lay there, staring at the ceiling. It was uneasy and comfortable all at the same time, their own strange way. Jim had thought about it once, the co-dependent relationship they'd developed over the years, and concluded that while it was too hard for them to be completely honest with each other, they couldn't lie to each other either. Half-truths, maybe, like the sleeping thing tonight, but Jim had never been so honest with anyone about his past, as little as he'd actually told Bones. It was a measure of the trust he had for the doctor, maybe more.

Jim was about to drop off when he heard Bones say softly, "I'm sorry 'bout today, Jim. About earlier... about everything."

"Don't." Jim rolled over onto his side, not wanting to talk about this right now.

He heard a deep sigh coming from Bones' side of the bed. "Look, I fucked up, and I need to know that things are okay with us."

A snicker from Jim. "You got me on board this ship in the first place." A quiet moment, then- "You came back for me."

"Then I just watched him..."

"Don't," Jim interrupted again. Yeah, Bones had watched Spock toss him off the ship, watched Spock attack him. Everyone stood there and watched, Jim knew, but... everyone wasn't his best friend. Bones was, and Bones hadn't believed in him. "Doesn't matter now." He'd gotten back on board, he'd fixed it all.

"Doesn't matter?" Bones whispered, like he didn't believe him. "Of course it matters..."

"I'm not mad at you." Another half-truth. It hurt like hell that Bones hadn't believed in him, had looked at him like he was nuts when he sat in that captain's chair. Bothered him more than he imagined it would, but he'd get over it. Just wanted to forget this day ever happened.

"Maybe I'm mad at me," Bones murmured.

Jim turned to face Bones, wrapping his arms around a pillow. There it was, that look on his face. This was the guy from last night, the one that touched his face like he cared about him, more than a friend. "Why did you come back for me, in the hanger?"

The sad look on Bones face faltered a moment, replaced by something warmer. "Wasn't gonna leave you there. How could I?"

The smallest smile fell on Jim's face. He'd expected to be left behind, the second worst moment of his life, so soon after the worst moment- hearing the board accuse him of cheating. _Academic suspension._ But that hadn't happened...

Bones lifted his hand, reaching out and slowly pushed a strand of hair off Jim's face, pulling him out of this thoughts. "How did you get back on board?"

Transwarp beaming, an exiled Scotsman, and an alternate reality version of Spock... "Long story," Jim said, unconsciously leaning into the touch, eyes getting heavy. "I'll tell you tomorrow, okay?" Right now, his head on the pillow, sleep sounded good. Just a couple hours, so he'd be fresh in the morning to deal with whatever was thrown his way.

Needed to get Bones asleep too, sitting there looking at him with sad eyes. "I'm not mad, Bones," Jim said softly, still not able to get that look off Bones' face. Maybe more was needed. Maybe more would be allowed, right now, Jim hoped, leaning forward just enough to brush their lips together. "You came back for me," he whispered into Bones' mouth, blue eyes locked on the hazel ones.

Bones didn't pull back, didn't deepen it, kept it light, pulling on Jim's lower lip with his own. "Thought I'd lost you," he whispered with a shuddering breath, reaching up to squeeze Jim's shoulder, "...'bout three times today. Don't wanna do that again."

Jim scooted in closer, wrapping his arms around Bones, shifting until his arms were in a comfortable place, one knee pressed between Bones' legs for balance. "I'm not going anywhere," he murmured into Bones' ear.

"Promise me?" Bones asked, his voice barely a whisper as he spoke into Jim's temple.

Jim made a quiet noise at that, kissing Bones' neck as he nodded. "Promise you that." At that moment, listening to Bones' breath even out slowly as he fell asleep, he'd never meant anything more.


End file.
